Give Into the Feeling

This past weekend, my sister and I went to a workshop given by Andy Dooley called, “Vibration Activation.”  It was about the law of attraction and how to get what you want out of life by using certain techniques to sort of re-train your thought processes.   One particular exercise we did was to tell our story, because we all have one, and to take that story, that is filled with pain, fear and uncertainty, and change it.  Andy’s goal was to help us create a new belief, to put us in a better feeling place, which ultimately would help us overcome whatever obstacle that was holding us back from getting us what we wanted.

When asking for volunteers, a man by the name of Mike came up on stage to share his story. He was in real estate, trying to make it, but not really being able to, while having an amazing and beautiful daughter, who was only 16 months old, and a wife, who was soon to be his ex on his plate.  He exposed his fears of not being a good father, or having enough money to provide, piece by piece to all two hundred of us audience members.  With each layer he exposed, my heart ached for him.  You could tell he was trying very hard not to cry while he told his story.  As he spoke, my inner voice whispered, “go up and hug him”.  It would’ve been easy enough because I was sitting in the front row, but I had this other voice telling me  he was a stranger and after all, why would I get up and hug a strange man on a stage in front of almost two hundred people?

I still though, couldn’t get it out of my mind that I needed to get up and go hug this man.  I too have a daughter, and can’t fathom the thought of going from seeing her everyday, to just certain days, or weekends.  I literally felt his pain and my own eyes began to tear.

When Mike was affirming back to Andy his new thought process, “that’s right, I have the most beautiful daughter in the universe,” he began to break down in a controlled sort of fashion.  It was the kind of cry where you really had no control, but tried to control it, yet there was no stopping it.  And as tears streamed down his face, as casually as he could let them, my insides turned outside.  My whisper turned into a scream and in my head it shouted, “GET UP AND GO HUG THIS MAN!”  It was like an itch that I HAD to scratch.

And so I did.  Without hesitation, I went up on the stage and opened my arms.  I hugged him with all of my might and I cried with him.  I was truly in the moment and had never experienced anything like it before.  He thanked me for the hug and I told him this wasn’t his forever, it was just his today.  I went back to my seat feeling a sense of peace like no other. I doubt that Mike knows it, but he was the one who actually gave ME a gift yesterday.  He helped me overcome my own fear of worrying about what other people would think when I gave him that hug.

I believe that life is too short to let moments pass us by like that.  Had I not hugged him, I would’ve wished I did for the rest of my life.  So thank you Andy Dooley for motivating me yesterday and teaching me that at any given moment, I can start a new belief, and let go of the old.  A new vibration is all we need to take us out of our comfort zones, and as you may already know, that my friend, is where the magic happens.  XOXOXOXO

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From Where I Stand

I have an amazing room in my house that used to be “the office”.  You know, a place where crap was thrown down, where bills piled up, in a sense, a room that wasn’t really used, but rather a dumping ground for what my husband and I didn’t want to deal with right away.  And after being sick of five years of the piling up and a room that wasn’t really functional,  I finally transformed it into my own space and made it a meditation room.

If you were to ask my seven-year old nephew what it now looked like, he would appropriately call it “Auntie’s Fancy Room”, which I think is perfect!   Pretty white lights hang on the terracotta walls and a large mirror reflects the 3 bay windows letting double the natural light in.  I have 2 bookcases filled with my little treasures and books.  A large framed picture of my girlfriends and I overlooking the ocean sits on the wall beneath a large beautiful piece of art that spells out the word, “BELIEVE”.  It is my haven.  It is my thinking space.  It is where I go when I need to let go of my day.

Every night, I light some incense and  stare at the picture of my friends looking out at the deep blue ocean, and I imagine the endless possibilities.  What are those waves bringing into my life?  What does the universe or God have in store for me?  I let it all wash over me.  I think about the day and the drama, and I give it all back.  With a few deep breaths, I let it cleanse my soul, and truly let go of the stress.   If I didn’t do that, then I just might ponder too long on a thought and take something personally that wasn’t my issue in the first place.

It happens all too often and it’s a shame really, how we tend to take on other people’s drama in the blink of an eye.   We are so quick to react to life, instead of taking that much-needed destressing breath, stepping back, counting to ten, and really think about what should come next.  It’s unfortunate that our mouths tend to work quicker than our brains do, because once we put something out there, we can’t take it back.  I know that I am guilty of it and I work HARD to bite my tongue on a daily basis.

I think we need to ask ourselves, is it really that important to be right at the risk of losing a relationship, or is it better to be kind and give the other person the benefit of the doubt?  We all have our days and I wish that people could see that life itself is about perspective.  There is what I see, and there is what others see.  And from where I stand, there is no such thing as right or wrong.  There just is.  Period.

If we were to be facing each other, you and I, and the sun was setting, I would say, “The sun is to my left,” yet, you, opposite me, would say, “No, the sun is to my right,” and we would both be right.  That is how I try to look at disagreements, and misunderstandings.  It’s all about perspective, and beliefs.  Everyone has feelings that are real.  We all want the same things; to be heard, loved , and validated.

Try just once in your day to believe that what other people say and do is about them, and their issues, and not about you and yours.  Take a deep breath, count to ten, and be kind.  I promise you, it will always feel better than being right.